Friends and Fun
David's college roommate was in town this week with his family. We met them at the park after they dropped their daughter off at the Air Force Academy. Dawn, the mom, held it together pretty well, I think. I was almost crying just thinking about taking any of my kids to college, let alone the AFA! New cadets are not allowed to call home for 6 weeks... AAAaaaaaaahhhhh! It was great to catch up with them, and just let our kids run around like maniacs. The weather here is a blissful 70 degrees, and we're happy to have it as it supposed to be scorching by this weekend. I love summer. I love the heat. But I'll take a cooler day here and there.

Pleasantly Surprised

Don't you love when your kids surprise you? While we are all still adjusting to a 3rd child in the family, Lily is really taking it in stride. We had braced ourselves for a very tough transition for her. She was the baby of the family, and she is clearly outnumbered by boys now, but of everyone (myself included) she is stepping up to the plate and really growing up. She is an incredible caregiver to Zinabu. While I never demand that she "watch" him or take care of him, she enjoys making him happy and spending time with him. Her relationship with David has grown immensely, too. I think all kids get in the rut of going to Mom first for everything--(example: child hollers, "Mom! I want some water!" while Mom is in the shower and Dad is standing right next to said child) but when I'm busy with Carver or Zinabu, Lily has sought out David and is spending more sweet time with him. It has been a blessing to watch their relationship blossom. A girl needs her daddy! So a big kudos to our Lily, who has taken all the recent changes in our house and shown us she's capable, strong, mature, and kind.

Where Has It All Gone?

The other night, we had just gotten all the kids to bed and I was bemoaning the fact that we really had no food left in the house. I had to go grocery shopping, so I figured I might as well just get it over with. The grocery store I went to is right next to an Old Chicago restaurant. It was 9 pm, and some young college-age people were leaving. I stared at them in amazement, stunned by the fact that I had once been so carefree and un-needed by 3 young kids. No doubt they were on their way to a fun movie where they would indulge in popcorn and Milk Duds. They would stay up till all hours and sleep until noon the next day. I wanted to yell out my window at them, "Enjoy your freedom! Enjoy it while you can!" Because look where I am today. It was 9 at night and all I wanted was to be home in my pajamas, in bed. But I was heading into the grocery store of all places, where I would have the unwelcome task of comparing cheese prices (tell me, why is cheese so expensive right now?) and stocking up on Goldfish crackers and the oh-so fun Finding-A-Vegetable-My-Kids-Will-Eat. This is my life. This is the glamour of motherhood. Grocery shopping is becoming a bit overwhelming to me (Zinabu eats like a horse on steroids) and I feel like it's all I do anymore. I'm trying to scrape the recesses of my brain for memories of the past life I had before kids. I know it's there. Food that included exotic names and ingredients. The memories become more and more dim as the current sleep-disturbed nights pile up on one another. This mothering thing is hard. I am finding it does not get easier. There is no day coming where I will finally "arrive" and say, "That's it! I've finally figured it all out!" I am just treading water right now, trying to stay afloat. Trying not to prevent my kids from a) hating me b) destroying property, and c) embarrassing themselves with terrible table manners. That's my checklist. If I can do those 3 things, I'll be happy.

English According To Zianbu

I was thinking the other day that I haven't used the Amharic dictionary in weeks. The first couple of weeks Zinabu was home, I carried that thing around and was constantly flipping through it to look up Amharic words. I communicated with Zinabu through single words: koy (wait), buhala (later), dabo (bread), mesa (lunch), kum (stop)... you get the picture. He communicated to us through nouns also. But now he's speaking in sentences. He has learned so much English it amazes me. I grieve the Amharic he's lost. Especially the cute little ow he used to say for "yes." But the fact that we can have conversations together and I can understand him and he understands us so well is a blessing. Just last night, we were riding bikes on our street but it was time to go in and get ready for bed. Zinabu said, "How about two more minutes?" How about? HOW ABOUT???? Where did he learn that? How is it that he's negotiating with us? It's so unreal.

And yet, there are still a few words were working on with him so that he gets the true meaning of them.

Share: Everyone has to share with me but I don't have to share with them.
Everybody's: Everything in this house belongs to me.
Together: I get to go first and then the rest of you can go.
No name-calling: I can dish it out, but I can't take it.

He's getting there.

The Cathy Award Goes To...

It's not light summer reading material, but July's issue of Vanity Fair is very much a must-read. I am so thrilled that Bono is the guest-editor, and most of the magazine is dedicated to a continent the rest of the world would rather not think about. To quote Bono on page 32, "Next year more than 10 million children's lives will be lost unnecessarily to extreme poverty, and you'll hear very little about it." If this were happening in Europe or North America, it would be breaking news day after day after day. But not for Africa...

It's a fascinating issue, and I hope you'll find yourselves a copy. You have many different covers to choose from, with Barack Obama, Muhammad Ali, Oprah Winfrey, Desmond Tutu, even (wonders never cease) George W. Can you blame me for buying the copy with Brad Pitt on the cover?

Come on. I'm only human!

Girls

This girl...


feels like this:


Sometimes this girl does too.


So we blew off the boys and went out for cinnamon rolls this morning. We feel better now.

A Warm Hello!

Zinabu wants to say a very special hellow to Selamawit, Sigame, and Dengalo. I love technology, because these kiddos KNEW Zinabu in the care center in Ethiopia. They've been reading my blog with their American families to see pictures of Zinabu and hear how he's doing. I cannot tell you how in love I am with these kids, as they spent time with my son before I could. I love, love, love this.

Zinabu says hi, that he's happy to be in America, and his favorite thing to do is play at a playground. Take care!

Head Wound!
Guess who got stitches in their forehead after falling face-first on our rock path? Not Carver. Not Lily. Not Zinabu.

My Mom.

Bless her heart...she was walking down our flagstone steps, holding Zinabu's hand to make sure he didn't fall, when she lost her balance. It was all very dramatic and bloody. The kids stood around her while blood dripped down her face and onto her clothes, while she reassured them, "I'm OK. Don't worry." I loaded her up in the car and we headed toward the "stitch-u-up" clinic. I had really thought I would be doing this with a child, not my mom.

My mom and I are always up for a donut, and as we drove by a Dunkin Donuts we debated stopping, but she looked pretty gruesome. You know, the bloody rag she was holding to her head and all. Fortunately there was virtually no one in the waiting room at the clinic, so they saw her pretty quick. The big downer was the cretin who did the administrative paperwork. She was updating her insurance information.

Cretin: "Are you still married? It says here you're married!"
Mom: "No, I'm a widow."
Cretin, in a loud, not-sensitive voice: "Then I need to change this to say widow."

Honestly, there have only been a few times in my life that I've wanted to slug someone. This was one of those times. It just wasn't fun. Fortunately, they sent my mom home with some nice stitches and some even nicer pain meds. She'll be sore and bruised for a few days, but we are so thankful she wasn't hurt worse. Pray for her.

And In Other Boring News...
I did it! I made the playroom. Turns out we had more toys than I thought, so it was 2 van trips to the Salvation Army for us! They still have a few things in the "toy library" to rotate through, but not much. I am at peace, as they've kept the new playroom spotless, and their rooms are always clean. Sigh. Now... about the rest of the house (ahem).


Carver and Lily's toys--lovely artwork on the wall.


Zinabu's toys, and on the right games and dress up bin.


Coloring books, paper, crayons in metal magazine racks on the wall.

Whew!
I made it through another Father's Day. Ever since my dad died (brain tumor--I still cannot grasp it after 4 years) I find Father's Day to be a yucky spot on the calendar. I have learned that a lot of TV and choosing-not-to-think-about-it to be excellent (though dysfunctional) ways of coping on hard days. I actually watched endless Bugs Bunny cartoons with Lily last night while I did her braids. She wanted them loooooonnnnggg this time, so to see her running around with braids down her back is so pretty. Braids are an instant self-esteem boost to her. She likes her hair natural, but with braids she turns into super-girl and whips her head around endlessly. Yesterday was warm so we packed up and headed to the canyon near our house where the snow runoff runs into a beautiful mountain stream. We had a lot of snow this year, so the stream is more like a river right now. The kids had fun--you know, after they had all argued for 20 minutes over who got to play with what shovel and bucket.

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The Best Day Ever
What a pleasant surprise to wake up to road construction on our street. A big dump truck and a scooper made for eye-popping entertainment for my kids. We sat on the curb for over an hour and just watched. Zinabu is so into trucks--and is surprising me with his memory of all their different names: dump truck, backhoe, cement mixer. How does he do it?


The other thing that happened is Lily had a tea party and Zinabu was the guest of honor. Zinabu was drinking water out of the little tea cup, and he kept saying, "Delicious!" That's a pretty big word, and he said it over and over again. After 15 minutes of this, I discovered Lily had tainted the water with huge amounts of sugar. No wonder it was so delicious. I don't know how much sugar Zinabu consumed, but he didn't take a nap!


We are a pretty laid back family and love our time together. I usually sign the kids up for one activity in the summer. Last year it was art classes. Once a week and we all went at the same time. That allows me to feel like they get a little extra curricular activity without me having to drive all over town 10 times a week. This year Carver is on a basketball team with his 2 best friends. It's once a week so I can handle that. Lily decided to do a dance class with her mostest-bestest-super-duper best friend Bailey. I never did dance. My friends didn't do dance. I feel like we entered a new universe of leotards, tights, and expensive shoes. I was so proud of her, though. She's so shy and hates performing anything in front of people. I think because she was with Bailey, she felt comfortable. It's a very basic class, and I think she's going to have a good time.

Passions

There are so many questions we encounter as a mixed-race family, an adoptive family, and an international adoptive family. I am by no means an expert on the subject. I can only speak to what has happened to us. You cannot take our experience, laminate it, and call it "Adoption 101". Every adoption is a journey as unique as a snowflake. Sure, there will be similarities--but we won't be the same. I have found the journey of adoption to be the most grueling and the most rewarding. About the time you think you cannot possibly take one more day of agony, waiting, wondering, and exhaustion--a glimmer of hope flickers, and you find you have it in you to sign one more paper, to make one more phone call, to wait one more day. Our family is a reflection of what David and I are most passionate about. Racial reconciliation, wiping out extreme poverty in Africa, and justice. We made ourselves available, and God led us down the beautiful path of adoption. Make no mistake--our children are not the results of our pity. They are not charity cases that we "saved." They are not "so lucky" to have us. They are our children, pure and simple. Adoption is not a solution to the crisis the children of our world are suffering from. Deep down, I believe the best option for all children is to be raised with their biological parents. I wish our country did a better job of being there for young women faced with the impossible choice of raising a child below the poverty level or relinquishing their baby. I wish our world did a better job of helping families fight extreme poverty so that they could not only keep their children with them, but have a decent meal every day. I wish the church would put aside the anti-abortion rhetoric for one month and use their energy to support the children who are already living and breathing on this planet, desperate to stay with their families. I wish, I wish, I wish...

One of the best pieces of parenting advice I received was from a woman leading an adoption training class back in 1998. She said, "Until your children can speak for themselves, you are their advocate." That is a huge responsibility, but I shoulder it with pride. I speak not only for me, but for Carver, Lily, and Zianbu.

Great Father's Day Gift

Still looking for a great gift for the dad in your life? Look no further! This flashlight gets this week's Cathy Award. It's a SOLAR flashlight, and if you go to http://www.bogolight.com/ you can read about the amazing difference it can make in the lives of people around the world. You buy one for dad, and another is donated to the organization of your choice. You can choose from areas like Afghanistan, orphanages in Rwanda, or charities like Samaritan's Purse. How can you say no? Do not buy another tie/golf mug/cologne/video game(yuck). Give the gift of light.

Photos of Our Trip

At a bubbling mud pit...


One of the steaming pools at Yellowstone


At the porch at the Old Faithful Lodge--an incredible building. One of our nation's finest!


In the closet at a hotel in Jackson, WY. It was 37 degrees and snowing.


One of the "happy" moments in the car. Cute kids!

We're Home!

Here is what went right:
1. We're home

Here is what went wrong:
1. Dead battery
2. Snow (yes, snow!)
3. The dinosaur museum in Utah was closed (the only reason we went to Utah)
4. Hubby got a "hefty" ticket by the park ranger for riding on a trail that was CLEARLY MARKED closed.
5. The lake we camped at had been drained. No water to play in.

I'll stop there. It was one of those trips we will laugh and laugh about in 5 years. For now, I'll chalk it up to a learning experience. The kids had an OK time, I think. Yellowstone was incredible for the time we were there. I'm hoping for good sleep and a long, hot shower tonight. I'll post again tomorrow.

Trying to Be a Nice Mom!


I know the inspiration behind this children's book. It was a mom who went camping for a week with her family. We pull out of civilization tomorrow and head for the hills (Yellowstone to be exact). Goodbye warm feet, clean hands, and flushable toilets. Hello mud, burnt hot dogs, and spiders. The kids are BESIDE themselves with excitement--even the littlest Ethiopian, who has no idea what he's in for. He just jumps for joy like the rest of the under-10 crowd. I am not, ahem, what you would call "outdoorsy." I love hiking and biking and swimming and getting dirty... but then I like to come home to a hot shower and clean sheets. Not to mention a refrigerator and essential stuff like that. We will at various points along the way find Internet access, so if I can post I will. If I don't post in a week, please call a forest ranger and tell him/her to look for the grumpiest mama around (that would be me) and rescue me with hot coffee and chocolate. Farewell, world.

ps--thanks to everyone who commented and emailed me with playroom advice.

Begging for Help!



Time for all you lurkers to come out of hiding. I am asking for your advice. I CANNOT believe I am posting about my messy house the day after I posted that Zinabu once lived in a hut. I mean, I'm not trying to make the point that Americans are terrible consumers, but the irony is gross. Here's the deal.

I like a clean house!

Adding a 3rd child has tipped the scales, so to speak, in child paraphernalia. I don't even let my kids have that many toys. But 3 kids, with 15 toys each (some in sets like that BLASTED Littlest Pet Shop and the wretched Bionicles) and all of a sudden were at 45 toys in this house. I have a toy "library" where we keep some of their toys. It's in our creepy crawl space, so no one really goes in there. If the kids get tired of the few toys they have in their room, then they can exchange it for a toy in the library. So far that's worked. But I can't keep up. There is stuff overtaking my house. So my question is.....

Playroom or no playroom?

Right now, we have no playroom. Each kid has toys in their room, but we also have the wooden train set and puzzles and balls and Legos that belong to everyone and hang out in our basement. I'm seriously considering burning...er, I mean moving the toys to the spare bedroom/office and converting it into a fun playroom. We don't use it very much, and it would be SOOOOOO nice to have the toys in there. If you have a playroom and it works for you, please respond. Help me....

Lots of Thinking


This is a picture of a traditional hut in Ethiopia. Found in the countryside and farmland, it is the type of hut Zinabu was born in and live the first 3 years of his life. This is a general photo I found on the web, but we do have priceless photo and video of Zinabu's family hut and very small farm. I am trying to come to grips with the great divide between Ethiopia and Colorado. Geographically, culturally, economically, and emotionally. Zinabu is the one I was prepared for to grieve and balk against living with us. I am finding that I am going through a lot of emotional work...just coming to grips with the very different upbringing Zinabu had before coming to us. It's hard for me to explain but I just need to process. I know the exact day and time Carver and Lily were born. I know they were born in sanitized hospitals. I know they had to wait only a few days and weeks before coming to live with us. It is so different with Zinabu. I can only guess at what his life was like. I don't know when he was born. I don't know his exact age. I don't know what he did or liked or thought. And I probably will never know as these memories are going to be lost for him before he can express them to us. I knew this in my head before Zinabu arrived, but back then he was just a face in a photo. Now he is my son! And these questions haunt me. CHSFS, our agency, goes to extremes to find out as much as they can about your child's birth history. They made a DVD for us that shows Zinabu's birthplace and some living relatives were interviewed. It is everything to us that we have this, and it will be everything to Zinabu as he gets older and has questions for us that we can't explain. The DVD is very sad and hard for me to watch, but it gives a pictorial account of Zinabu's life during the in between of his first family and us.

Darfur

George W. decided to impose sanctions against Sudan to try to stop the violence in Darfur. The sanctions are against companies that supply petroleum and military vehicles. I don't know if that will make a dent to the thousands of people who have already died or are still suffering. "The people of Darfur are crying out for help,'' Bush said. "I promise this to the people of Darfur: The United States will not avert our eyes from a crisis that challenges the conscience of the world.'' In my opinion, the White House is too little too late in this one. (Like 4 years!) Besides, sanctions always hurt the poor, the children, the displaced, the people that have so little. I wish there were another way...

Here in comfy America, I have the privilege of cooking whatever I want for dinner, drive-thru Starbucks, fresh-cut flowers, 25 different brands of toothpaste, organic asparagus or conventional, free checking, and all kinds of other luxuries I take for granted on a moment by moment basis. It's sickening. What am I most thankful for? My kids. Their health and safety. Their love. There was a lot of giggling coming from Zinabu's bed tonight, and when I went to check on him, this is what I found.

They're sleeping together like 2 hot dogs in a bun right now. How blessed I am.

Medical Mysteries Revealed

It's official. I am no longer waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak. It's been 3 weeks since Zinabu was contagious, and I am not sick. Whoopie! I'm in the clear. And what is the mysterious virus he suffered from, you ask? The MUMPS! Most of our close friends knew what was going on, but I didn't want to post the diagnosis on my blog until things settled down. Zinabu was exposed to the mumps in Ethiopia, but we are so thankful to God he did not get sick until he was safe at our home, and under excellent medical care. He was very, very ill. Turns out the mumps can hit you in different ways: very little, horrible, or somewhere in between. Zinabu was in the "horrible" category. That's why he was such a big hit at the hospital. The staff there doesn't see mumps anymore. It's also why we were quarantined and treated like lepers. I understand, but it was a rough week. David had his booster shots before travel, Carver and Lily are all caught up on their vaccinations, but my mom and I were the lone rebels. We had to track down if we'd received at least one mumps shot (yes) and a booster (er...no). One shot kinda-sorta-maybe protects you. You really need the booster for full protection. We think I had some kind of booster in 1982... but that was pre-Michael Jackson's Thriller! Who can remember anything way back then? So it is with much celebrating that I can post we are all mumps free!

We are moving up in the medical world this week. We march on toward stool samples. Yes, that's right. Zinabu makes 'em and I collect 'em. Time to find out for sure if there are any unwanted guests residing in his intestines. I don't know if they'll find parasites, but I do know they will find pounds of strawberries. I cannot keep enough produce in this house. Especially strawberries. Today I bought this:


The photo makes it look small, but it's actually over 4 pounds of strawberries. I can guarantee they will be gone in 48 hours. But look at this sweet face. Who could say no to it?

CAFFEINE!

This week's Cathy Award goes to caffeine. It is coursing through my veins right now! I'm trying to figure out a way to grind espresso beans and mix them in with Diet Coke. Zinabu slept a little better last night. Fortunately David is home today and I plan to whine and complain a lot about how tired I am. Hopefully he'll get so sick of me he'll beg me to take a nap! But I have to get through this morning, first.

The What-Were-They-Thinking Award was a no-contest this week. The woman at the grocery store (why is it always the grocery store???) who walked up to me and the kids and asked, "What mix are they? Are they siblings?" HELLO! My kids have ears! They can hear you! I didn't answer her question. I pretended to be really busy with the orange selection. Why is this a big deal? Because it sends the message to my children that they aren't and will never be siblings. This is the one question I wish would go away and die in a cave somewhere.

I also don't know what I was thinking yesterday when I thought I would dink around with my blog a little bit. Next thing I knew, little fingers snuck in a pushed some buttons to "help" me and my blog was in pieces. I think I've got it back together, but I learned not to even attempt any changes while my kids are around. I hope that very soon I can start putting video and photos up of David's trip to Ethiopia. I need to go through the video, but I'd love for you all to be able to see some of the highlights. Look for that to come sometime this week. Have a fun Saturday.

Tired!

I'd like to buy this sign and plant it in our front yard. I am very sleep deprived these days--so much that I'm going to submit my brain to science so they can study my ability to function at 2% instead of 100%. Sleep issues with a newly adopted toddler are to be expected. I'm just in a quandary about what to do. Fortunately, Zinabu isn't screaming all night long. He's just waking up every hour or so and needing me. I don't like co-sleeping because I never can sleep when I share a bed with a kid. (It's hard enough with a husband!) I do snuggle with Zinabu and I also have a chair next to his bed. I sit in the chair until he falls back asleep, but in another hour he's awake again and needing me. I hope this is a short phase. I also hope for a lot of wisdom about how to help him go back to sleep on his own. I can't keep this up forever. Any advice?

Just For Fun

Warning! Shameless Bragging Ahead...



A huge thanks to Mary at Owlhaven, who gave me the illustrious Golden Keyboard Award. She posted a question on her blog about how to promote friendship among your kids. I responded that I try to say "Yes" to my kids when they ask to do something that gets them working together. For my kids, that usually involves a huge mess, but I try to look past that and let them do something fun (like big mud holes and lemonade stands). Aren't we ALL too quick to say "No" to our kids just because it's easier??? How about you? How do you promote friendship among your kids?

I think the bigger question is who is Mary to be asking for advice/ideas? She has 10 children. Yes, let me repeat that. 10! Eight at home and 2 on the way from Ethiopia. Wow.

I'm so used to sticking my foot in my mouth that it's nice to know I said something worthwhile for a change.

A Day With The Animals...

The animals being the billions of children at the zoo today. When I started blogging, I wanted to refrain from negative posts about my kids (and husband). Still, there's "wants" and there's "real life." Today was the big field trip to the zoo, and both Carver and Lily's classes went. How fun, I thought. I'll help chaperon and bring Zinabu. We'll have a wonderful time together. (Snort!) Famous last words. Here in our city, this is the last week of school for most districts. Every elementary school in a 50 mile radius seemed to be at the zoo today. Check out the look on Lily's face in the photo. That's an accurate reflection of how we all felt. Zinabu threw no fewer than 5 tantrums today. Too overstimulated. Me too.

May we never speak of this day again. Ever.

Chatty

David has had to work mega hours this week, and weekend, and I've barely seen him. I've spoken to him for maybe 2 minutes a day, and it hardly counts as conversation. As for the other man in my life, Zinabu talks NON-STOP. He wakes up talking and doesn't stop until he closes his eyes. Yesterday we went to a playground and Zinabu heard a family speaking in Spanish. I swear his eyes lit up and he thought, "Hey! There's another language I can learn! MORE words!" He uses short phrases, and he speaks half Amharic, half English. But he says the same thing over and over and over again. When we're all together in the car or sitting eating dinner together, I will tell Zinabu something, and he repeats it to everyone else as if they didn't know what I said. He talks to himself, he talks to his toys, he follows me into the bathroom and talks. The only time he's quiet is when we're out in a public place with lots of people and he feels intimidated. Then he's very quiet and he clings to me like I'm a life raft. It's good though. He seems to know that David and I protect him and are his family, while others are not. That's a huge step in the bonding process.

Today we are skipping church (scandalous!) and enjoying a day together! It's sunny, warm, and a great day to dig in the garden. I'm a little behind this year with my seedlings, so I may have to suck it up and buy some vegetable plants and flowers. But I won't bore you with all those details. Have a wonderful Sunday!

C is for Cookie

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The Helmet Is Replaced!


It appears Zinabu has found something that trumps the helmet. An old set of headphones from our pre-iPod days. Given the fact that we have few battles to pick with our new boy, headphones all day (and all night) is just plain funny!

I would love to go to bed right now with a pair of headphones...preferably playing some great book-on-tape I could listen to. How ironic that even AFTER you bring your child home from Ethiopia, the paperwork continues. The piles are growing, and each day I say, "I'll get to that tonight." Eh hem--it hasn't happened yet. Not to mention reams of thank-you notes and pictures to send to family. I'm swooning at the thought!

So Much News
I had a sweet, poignant Mother's Day. I was overwhelmed with gratitude that Zinabu is with us now. But given that there are 3 birth mothers attached to our lives, Mother's Day can be a little tricky, too. My children's pasts are so different...so unique...I feel blessed that Carver, Lily, and Zinabu call me mom. I waver at times about how I think/feel toward their birth families. And honestly, there are lots of times I don't think about their birth families at all. I am so connected to my kids, so MOM to them, it's easy to disengage from their biological roots. Zinabu's situation brings it all back--slamming me in the face. There is so much pain, so much unfairness, so much grief for one so young. It's hard to put into words...

Lots of people want to know how Zinabu is doing with the language issue. I confess it is more fun than frustrating. Remember, he's 3. Most 3 year olds lives revolve around themselves, so I understand what he's saying 80% of the time. I would guess I know 30 Amharic words by now, and Zinabu knows about 40 English words. He's doing amazing. This morning he learned the word "yummy" and he's said it often today. He uses the word "no" emphatically and with gusto. He loves to call us animal names. Today he called me a chicken and laughed his head off.

Zinabu is much more relaxed about his clothes, although he loves to change shirts several times a day. He spends a lot of time walking through the house wanting to know who owns what. He points to the scissors and I say, "Mommy's." He points to a toy and I say "Zinabu's." He's fine if I tell him something is Carver's or Lily's...he just wants to know the lay of the land. We are teaching him "Everyone's" so he knows there are lots of things around the house that we share. We've almost got this down. Today he was carrying a can of black beans and saying, "Every body's Zinabu's. " Like if he adds his name at the end it makes it a little more his.

Zinabu has very little interest in TV (which I think is great) but I feel like a little Sesame Street is a good thing for him at this age. We got a Cookie Monster DVD from the library, and I ask you... is there anything funnier than a 3 year old, Amharic-speaking boy belly laughing at Cookie Monster? Humor is universal, and Zinabu loves to laugh. He really amazes me.

My Children


Lily--just turned 6 and really enjoys mixing and matching separates. I cannot even pretend that I care what she wears. As long as she's happy...


Zinabu--3 and positively in love with his bike helmet. He won't take it off.

Carver--8 and a darling...except for the current haircut. He caught me in a moment of weakness when I was trying to say "yes" to my kids a lot (right after Zinabu arrived).

Who would I be without my kids? It's hard to say. They make me a better person, no doubt about it. I'm so proud to be their mom.

Happy Mother's Day to All You Wonder Women


I, for one, am awfully proud of myself for making it through a whole week as a mother of 3, and I only cried 28 times. Wow! Instead of Mother's Day, I feel like celebrating Referee Day, because I've been doing a lot of whistle blowing and calling of fouls among siblings. Funny... Zinabu is doing fantastic. It's the rest of us that are trying to adjust to him. Carver and Lily are justifiably put out by Zinabu being 3 and into everything. About half the time they love him, and the other half they are far, far away from him. I reassure them we all just need some time to get to know one another. And I reassure them it will be a whole lot easier when Zinabu is more fluent in English. Zinabu is eating us out of house and home. He eats as much as Lily and Carver put together. I don't know how he does it. His favorite food right now is oranges, and he would eat 5 a day if I let him. He's better about letting me take clothes/layers off of him if it gets too hot, but he's REALLY attached to his bike helmet and he wears it constantly. I promise to post a picture of him in it. I've been too busy being mom to really spend time taking pictures. The house is a MESS, but I am doing my best giving time and love to my kids...and for now that's the way it's supposed to be.