Wants and Needs
Carver's needs are so simple. He works hard in school all week and lives for Saturdays. Time to himself. Freedom. Silly, goofy jokes. And skateboarding. He needs me to take him to the skateboard park, and I do not begrudge him the desire. In all too short a time he will be driving himself, and I will be unnecessary. He won't shoot me his signature "thumbs up" sign after landing a tricky move because I won't be there to see it. Right now he wants me to watch him. So I do.
Lily--the middle child. She needs to have her voice--her opinions--heard. She needs to know that she has a role in the family. So when she pipes up that she wants to make dinner, and dinner will be PB&J on Ritz crackers, then that's what dinner is. She will be strong and determined, because I want her to be. And I let her try.
Zinabu wants to be loud and touching me all the time. Fingers on me every minute he's nearby. I need him to give me space, but he needs me to be parenting board, sounding board, and tactile board all rolled into one. He wants to reach out to me in love but doesn't always know how. He needs me to be patient. He needs to know that his exuberance is appreciated. So I try. Because I want to try.