Despite how insanely crazy our lives are right now, I've got a bee in my bonnet to adopt again. There are a chunk of adoptive moms that I know who are also facing this constant tug of the heart. The eternal "let's adopt just one more" mind game. The desperate longing to give a home to a child who needs one and to grow our family in an exciting way. Once you go through the adoption process--which is no picnic, I can tell you--but are rewarded for all your waiting and gnashing of teeth with the most amazing child, well... you find it hard to say "We're done." My heart is yearning for a 10 year old boy. I know David and I--and Carver and Lily and Zinabu--would make a great family for a boy of that age. I know there are thousands of boys that age waiting for a home, here in the U.S. and also Ethiopia. But I think we really are done. And that makes this so much harder.

Next week Zinabu will have been with us for 2 years. Hooray! He has grown and changed and thrived in ways I never could have imagined. Not even in my wildest dreams. And he's still that nutty, happy kid that walked off the airplane and into my heart.

I hate being done.


Vivi said...

You guys are amazing. I hope you come to a conclusion that lets your heart be ok.

Courtney Orrange said...

well put. that's how i feel many days. Maybe it'll change sometime in the future. I still hope.

Jill said...

Cathy ~
I can relate ~ after my email to you awhile back, we might also be at the "done" phase for a variety of reasons and knowing it always isn't an easy thing!
On another (sombering) note as well ~ we watched Marley & me last night. I'd read your post several days prior so had to chuckle (through the sobs) as I imagined watching it w/ several kids right before bedtime. :( I thought the movie was well-done, though, and appreciated that it stuck to the book!

Chatter said...

Since you are such wonderful parents I just love to hear you are 'thinking' about it. Many of days I am certain I can't handle any more kids but a bigger part of me knows that there is no way we are done. Good luck in figuring out what lies ahead.

Heatherbean said...

It ain't over till it's over, lady.
Just for now...ya never know.