So this summer, both Zinabu and Carver are playing baseball with our city's parks and recreation program. They both love it and are having a blast at the games and practices. All we want is for our kids to learn how to play well with others, know that winning isn't everything, encourage their teammates, and have fun learning a sport. I got a call on Friday afternoon from one of the mothers of Zinabu's team. She wanted to let me know that we'll be purchasing trophies for all the kids because, "you know... they love them so much." She quickly added this is an out of pocket expense because parks and rec. doesn't provide any trophies.
Duh, lady. They're 5. Why the heck do they deserve trophies????
I resent living in a society where my kids are rewarded for doing what is expected of them. I think it's completely ridiculous to give a bunch of kindergartners trophies for hitting a ball off of a T stand and running the bases. Please. If someone wanted to give Zinabu a trophy for traveling to a new country with a bunch of white people and blending into a new family that didn't speak his language and surviving a week in hospital isolation with the mumps, by all means--give him one. But for T-ball?
The part that really burns is that there was no vote among parents about whether or not we wanted to purchase trophies. I was just called and "told" that this is what we're doing. I need to bring $8.oo to the next practice for the trophy fund. I want to stand my ground, but if I do then my child is the only one who doesn't get one. And that's not fair because this isn't his battle to fight, it's mine. So I'm trying to decide how cruel and heartless I'll sound if I go to practice and at least suggest we nix the trophies--and have all the other parents whisper about me behind my back, "That's the cheap and heartless woman who won't even buy a trophy for her child!"
I just think the whole thing is stupid.
6 comments:
Cathy - HOW DARE those other parents even THINK about talking badly about you! :-) I for one am with you on this. I think that if each parent wants to provide their child with a trophy on their own terms to say, "Hey Kiddo, I'm proud of you", then that is up to them and should be OPTIONAL and not required. But, like you, I don't think it should be necessary to give the kids trophies - trust me when I say it will definitely mean more to them when they know that they actually EARNED it (like wining state by beating all the other teams or something). However, I do not have any advice on how to handle this and do not look forward to the day when I am the mom that gets talked about because I find this uber-silly!!! :-)
I'm with you on this one. That is just flippin' ridiculous.
I never comment on your blog but I have to chime in on this one. You need to say something and I completely agree with you.
I teach, and there are students that think they deserve an A for just showing up in class, no work completion just showing up. I will no longer wonder where they get this "the world owes me something" attitude. I will now be blaming this on the parents that paid $8.00 for a trophy because their kid showed-up at park and rec baseball:)
We just faced this same issue with little dribblers basketball. Speak up you may find that more parents are with you than you think! It ended up being just about evenly divided on our kiddos team and a compromise of a certificate of participation was accepted by all parents. Most folks don't want to be the one to bring it up- for all the reasons you listed- but I bet at least some of the other parents are having the same thoughts as you are about how ridiculous this trophy thing has become!
blessings,
Heather
Sorry on this one. You are out voted but probably right. Get used to medals, treats, plaques and award ceremonies.
Been there and done that.
Part of the culture. If your kid plays sports, this call will come each season.
Save this heel digging for: Coaches that yell at children, parents who yell at children, and
excessive practice time while kids are small. (Or the high school coach that demanded that 9th grade girls lift weights unsupervised at 6 AM each morning. Wonder why the girls played only volleyball and not basketball as well.)
Sad but true.
We can talk about this one more.
I still have about 50 statuettes in the basement. I have tried to throw them out, the kids screamed when I tried. I finally boxed up and mailed to their homes.
I completly agree with you but also find the balance tough to find. I remember as a kid when our sport's games were just a ball, bat, a few bases and lots of fun! When did it all get so technical? Glad to hear that the Parks and Rec has a good T-Ball program...I was looking for something for Tobin.
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