Halloween was just what we needed: a night to pretend things are normal and ok around here. We were blessed with incredible weather--a rare event in Colorado. I think over the last 5 years Halloween has been cold or snowy. This year it was 70 degrees that day, so no need for mittens, coats, or snow boots over costumes. Lily was a cowgirl and Zinabu was the most hilarious looking werewolf. Carver (not pictured) went trick-or-treating with his best friend. It was our first time without him, and I was sad for me but happy for him that he got to go have so much fun.

Buddy's costume was from the vet. He got to be a cone head because he impaled his leg on a branch last week and needed a bunch of stitches. Just when we thought we wouldn't have any more unforeseen expenses, we got to pay the vet a big ol' pile of money for surgery. Whoopee.

I have been avoiding Facebook and blogs, only because when things are so sad here it's hard to read about other people's happy families. I know that no family is perfect, and that everyone is dealing with their own stuff. I get that. But I'm especially sensitive to the fact that things around here are crappy and it just plain hurts to be reminded of it every time I turn around. That's the great challenge in grief and pain, isn't it? To deal with it at home, let people help you as best they can, but still face the world with grace--even joy, as you then celebrate life going on in other people's lives. I'm learning how to do that. It's not easy at all, but I'm learning.


hotflawedmama said...

1) I am so happy you all got to do Halloween.

2) I imagine it's a steep learning curve. Love to all of you.

rebekah said...

You are always missed when you're not around.

Stacy said...

Cathy, for someone I've only met once in real life .. I sure love you and your family to pieces. Blowing some peace your way. and btw my word verification is "copings"...

Cindy said...

(((hugs))) sending you our best.
Cute costumes : )

jayme said...

I'm glad that Halloween was able to add a little levity to your lives. I *love* the werewolf costume!, and miss Lily makes a lovely cowgirl (no surprises there!)

I think about you all the time. There are lots of times I feel the need to take "media breaks" as well. Sometimes it is just too hard to face other people's happiness with the sort of grace and goodwill that I know I should have when things in my own life seem to be falling apart.

Anyway, I miss you. (And I imagine I'm not the only one who feels that way!) Sending love and good wishes your way.