I Used My Brain--And it still works!

I have a friend that had an extra ticket to an author lecture series at Denver University. So we headed up to Denver last night, ate Korean food, went to hear an amazing author speak, and got home late. All that and my brain could handle it! So even though today I was back to laundry, dentist appointments, cereal, and playing with Matchbox cars, it's nice to know my brain is still functioning when I really need it.

And in other news, Zinabu has hit rock-bottom with socks. We figured out he'll wear Lily's socks if they're inside out. They still bother him, but if we tell him to just try it for 5 minutes then he usually gives it a go and moves on. Another friend of mine who is a teacher told me that kids who have issues with tags on clothes or difficulty with the way clothes feel are often gifted and talented. So maybe if we muddle through the socks issue, Z will wind up at Harvard someday. Brilliant.

Target, Thy Name is Evil!

Don't you hate when you go into Target for just one thing and come out $100 poorer? I actually went in to return something and still managed to drop a chunk of change! It's because I had no kids with me so I could actually wander around slowly. I guess that was my downfall right there... the wandering... slowly.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Three years ago, I was frantic over what my kids ate on Thanksgiving. It's the kind of holiday where the soda flows freely and there are sweets within reach no matter where you turn. So I learned to chill out, throw caution to the wind, and let my kids eat whatever. Today Carver had white food: a piece of white meat, bread, and Sprite. Oh, and a sugar cookie. Lily and Z did much better. Z had green bean casserole for the first time and pronounced it "Yummy!' Zinabu also had an entire can of orange soda (be still my heart).

I had a fantastic day with my family, my cousins, and all the significant others. My cousin Casey even dressed up as Santa and surprised the kids. We managed to wrestle the tired lumps I call children into bed after a long day and I am happy to say I'm right behind them.

Let's Hear It For...Corn!

I don't know about your neighborhood, but around here we are seeing Christmas trees in living rooms and inflatable snowmen on lawns.

What the heck happened to Thanksgiving????

I feel more strongly than ever--after seeing the first Christmas commercial on TV the day after Halloween!--that we need to preserve Thanksgiving and hold off on the red and green decor until December. Carver and Lily had school today and I baked cornbread, brought cornmeal in bags for them to look at, popped popcorn, and gave a very inspiring talk to a class of 6-year-olds about the Pilgrim's first feast. Perhaps I changed a life today and made, in some small way, Thanksgiving more meaningful to someone. (sigh)

On another note, Zinabu has stinky feet. He is going through what we hope is a very short phase of not liking socks... or shoes... or tight pants... or sleeves... or clothes in general. (Mindy, help!) He is refusing to put on shoes but will submit to Crocs when we go outside. We'll see how that works out in the snow tomorrow. So he keeps wearing rubber shoes and no socks and I smell things growing.

What Doesn't Belong?

So I found THIS in the backyard this afternoon--2 kids, one rabbit, one umbrella, and a box of glittery makeup. I didn't know what to say!

My Sanity

Because we have had the most gorgeous fall EVER, I have been able to remain sane with the aid of a baby jogger. I love Z dearly, and I spend a lot of time laughing with him--but the kid does not ever, ever stop talking. So usually around 1:00 in the afternoon, when I need a little quiet, I strap Z in and off we go. I can walk for an hour, and so far Z has remained happy. I admit to using bribery at times, but mostly he just likes to look at the scenery. He's really fond of finding sticks to stick in the spokes of the wheels, but he hasn't lost a finger yet.

I am SO looking forward to Thanksgiving. A big hurrah always meets us at my Uncle Jim's house. It's threatening to snow (so much for the weather) next week, and I will be beside myself with anger if it ruins our plans to drive to his house. I might need to stock up with a little extra food in case our feast day is a snow day.

Proof of a Good Time

Are you tired of watching Z dance? More video of his "activeness." Someone find this kid a mosh pit.

Look at that face! And he hasn't even EATEN the cake yet!

Happy 4th Birthday, Z!
Today Zinabu is 4. I am grieving that I will never (unless he## freezes over!) have another 3 year old. And we only had him at 3 for half of the year. But Z is beside himself with excitement, so I can't be gloomy for too long. He's watched Carver and David have birthdays recently, so he knows what this is all about. David took him out for a cinnamon roll breakfast, and Z is bouncing around the house like a freak pogo stick. It's a loooooooooonnnng wait till 5:30 tonight when David will be home and we can open presents. I'll post lots of photos later.

Girls Night Out
While David took the boys to a college hockey game (by the way--it was Zinabu's first and he loved it), Lily and I spent a little girl time together. I can usually tell when she needs it. She starts saying things like, "I don't want to live in this house anymore!" or "I am sick of brothers!" You know, small clues like that.

So we hit Starbucks, where we indulged in Peppermint Hot Chocolate (seriously people, it's really good!), and we played a few mean rounds of Go Fish. Then we were off to a nail salon, where for the sum of $3, she got to have her nails painted. The hardest part of the evening was choosing between lime green nail polish or silver sparkles. She went with the sparkles and I have to agree, it's a winner.

I think the toughest part of having 3 kids is making sure I spread myself 3 ways and spend enough time with each child. Hands down, Z gets the most of me. So I try to make sure I'm investing quality time with C and L. And this is the biggest reason we are not adopting any more children. I don't think I am capable of being a good mom to 4 or 5 kids. I applaud those who can.

Just when I thought his English was so impressive! What a goofball.

Zinabu Rules

Other than a freak snowstorm, we have had a gorgeous fall. Yesterday it was almost 80 degrees so the kids got to play outside in shorts--reminiscent of summer. Lily, when she's in the right mood, is Zinabu's best friend. She was feeling especially generous (must be all the Halloween sugar) and she drew this picture.


It's a lion with a crown on it's head, and above it you can see "Zinabu rools." I know Lily was just being nice, but as far as Zinabu is concerned, she got it right. In his 3 and a half year old mind, he rules the house, the neighborhood, the city--heck, the world! He'd like to announce his bid for president.

Snnnooooooooore!

Welcome to my boring life. Why haven't I posted? Well, let's see. What do you want to hear about first? How about cleaning up the rabbit poop? Or what about the 6 thousand loads of laundry I did? No, no. Wait--how about the snotty nose I wiped? Yeah. Good stuff.

The Obligatory Halloween Post!

We survived! I, especially, had the longest day of my life as I had a tummy bug and was stuck home all day with Zinabu--who was bouncing off the walls and asking every 2 minutes if it was time to go get candy. Really... the concept that you ring someone's doorbell and say the magic words "Trick or Treat" and they hand you candy!!!!! It was like it was too good to be true for him. He had to see it to believe it. At the end of the day, he was very impressed and I think he has a new respect for our neighbors.

Z's costume has a very long tail behind it, and he liked whipping it around. Lily was a hula dancer--with a fleece and gloves, too. Carver, obviously, was a Ninja Turtle. He will dress up for Halloween until he's 23.

And now I am home with 3 huge buckets of candy and I'm trying to stay busy so I don't eat it. Help!

It's Final!
We finalized our adoption with Zinabu here in America. It's really a validation of the adoption from Ethiopia, but it allows us to get a new birth certificate for Z--and apply for the necessary Certificate of Citizenship. Most importantly, it was a celebration for our family! With both Carver and Lily, we had a court celebration. A very kind judge asks us some questions, and we get to talk about what a blessing each child is. Then there is an official pronouncement that our kids are officially and legally and irrevocably ours. What was so fun this time around is that Carver and Lily were old enough to understand and witness the event. It was priceless to me that they got to see how adoption works in the courtroom! Zinabu was so happy, as it meant he legally took on David's middle name as his first name. We will continue to call him Zinabu, of course, but the symbolism is there.

I am a very blessed woman.


Outside the courtroom.


After finalization with our judge.

ROAR!

I will never, ever forget Zinabu's first day with us here in our home. Because he was very much on Ethiopia time, he fell asleep at 4:00 in the afternoon and woke up at 3:00 am. I got up with him, and...really...it was amazing that Zianbu didn't panic. I was a new person to him, he was in a new home, with new smells, and we had to tiptoe around and whisper so we didn't wake anyone else up for another hour or two. And he spoke no English. He desperately needed a bath, so I filled the tub with warm water and bubbles, and I dumped the bucket of bath toys that we keep in our bathroom into the water. Zinabu climbed in, and very methodically picked out the plastic dinosaurs and threw them onto the bathroom floor. He didn't like them at all, and he was making faces at me like, "What are those creepy things? Geesh!" He wanted no part of them.

Since then, he's made a complete turnaround as far as dinosaurs are concerned. I didn't push them, but we have lots of leftovers from when Carver was a little younger, not to mention lots of books about dinosaurs. Zinabu slowly grew used to seeing them around and eventually expressed more interest in them. Well now it's one of his favorite subjects. Even when he brushes his teeth, he likes to foam at the mouth and roar--showing his teeth to me like a T. Rex. And don't forget--for Halloween Z is going to be a Stegosaurus. He is very concerned he might hurt me with his spikes on his back, but I told him I'll survive.

Have I mentioned I think this little guy is pretty cool?

Hair
Let me preface this post with a little background. In the African American community, hair is a big deal. A really big deal. How you care for it, how it looks, and what products you use on it all reflect a personal emphasis on its importance. And the importance of caring for black hair is not something to be taken lightly. If I don't know what I'm doing with Lily's hair, it would very much break off and fall out. It's so fragile. Also, if I don't take good care of Lily's hair, then it reflects back on me--and it is not a good thing. People would look at Lily and see an unkempt head and then look at me and come to the conclusion that I am not a good mom. For myself, there are many days that I grab a baseball cap and shove it on my head and don't even think about my hair. Or on a day that I'm just too plain lazy to really care, I pull it back in a clip and call it done. But with Lily, I can't get away with that. Her hair is gorgeous but very demanding. It's never a "quick" brush and go. It moisturizer, combs, oils, sprays, clips, bands, and styles--braids, twists, parts, sections, and poofs. If I put as much time into our taxes as I did on Lily's hair, the IRS would hire me. Being Lily's mom--and caregiver of her hair--is a huge privilege. So I was so disappointed in myself yesterday.

The kids had a day off of school for parent/teacher conferences, so we hung around in our pajamas and just played. By afternoon it was almost 80 degrees, so I decided to take the kids to a playground. I looked at Lily's hair, and figured it was "good enough." Two ponytails that were a little frizzy, and her hair looked dry, but I thought, "Who cares?" We got to the playground and were there for 5 minutes when a beautiful black woman arrived with her 4 daughters. That's right: 4. And every girl had their hair perfectly coiffed and styled. I felt like yelling, "Hey, I know my child doesn't look so great now, but I REALLY work hard on her hair ALL THE OTHER days of the year." I also felt like the uneducated white woman who has no clue how to do a black child's hair. It didn't help that Carver really needs a haircut and looks like a Furby.

Needless to say, I spent most of this morning on Lily's locks, and she's back to her gorgeous head of hair.

9 Years Ago Today...

I became a mom. It was 9 years ago that a baby boy flew on an airplane from Georgia to Minnesota, where David and I (and a ton of family and friends) waited eagerly at our church. The director of the adoption agency had a smooth flight, held our baby boy, and landed in Minneapolis around noon. She was picked up by friends, and driven to where we were huddled, eagerly awaiting this arrival. I remember feeling like I was going to throw up. I remember it was a beautiful fall day, with leaves on the ground. I remember looking at David and thinking, "What have we done?" I remember standing there with a diaper bag, as if I had a clue what I was supposed to do with it.

And then he arrived. They pulled up in a blue minivan and we hurried inside where we could hold him in private. Friends and family gave us some space, and our escort walked in with the tiniest bundle in her arms. There was a thatch of black hair, and then the most beautiful brown eyes... and the sweetest little face.

We had a dedication ceremony right there, and I don't know who was happier--Diana or my mom. All the photos we have of that day show those two hovering over Carver.

To be honest, it was not an easy adjustment with Carver. I was a new mom who had no clue what she was doing, and he was colicky and mad. But once we found our groove, it was easy see that I wouldn't go back. I wouldn't have changed a thing. And today, when he wakes up in the morning and runs downstairs to hug me and yell, "Hey Mom! I love you." I cannot believe how blessed I am.

Snow!

We had a bit of a blizzard on Sunday. It was great! Once the wind died down, I sent the kids out to play. I had literally just bought Z gloves the day before (as we didn't have any for him yet). It was bitterly cold, so I figured he'd last maybe 15 minutes outside. Well, he sure proved me wrong! After an HOUR AND A HALF I had to drag the kids in to warm up and eat some lunch. They went right back outside again while they gulped down the last bite! The snow is already melted, and it will warm back up to the 70s again in a day or two, but it was fun while it lasted. Looks like I have another snow bunny on my hands!

Carver and Lily at the hockey game.


Seriously, who is the moron who invented these inflated whacking sticks? They hand them out for free when you walk in the door. I wanted to scream, "What in heaven's name are you doing giving those to a 9 year old boy? My night is ruined!" The hockey game was great, but I spent most of my time apologizing to the people in front of us every time Carver hit them in the head.

Lily at the Air Force football game.



Zinabu, who ate 10 gallons of popcorn.

I'm tired, but happy. Getting out of the house means I don't have to clean it. A huge storm is moving into Colorado tonight--so while it was 80 degrees today, it will probably snow and have a high of 28 degrees tomorrow. Good day for a fire in the fireplace and hot chocolate.